The wedding toast. The final words of all the speeches and an opportunity to impart a few words of wisdom right? Not for these best men who gambled on an alternative option and lost in spectacular fashion. Here are real wedding toasts that crashed and burnt.
- Ladies and Gentlemen, please be upstanding – for my cock. Which incidentally is also upstanding.
- One word of advice: wait until you have kids before you cheat.
- To a thrilling lifetime together spent watching thousands upon thousands of hours of television.
- May this marriage turn out better than your first one.
- May all your ups and downs be between the sheets.
- I know I promised that I would make a toast, but I didn’t have time to write anything.
- To the proud parents to be
- I’ve been friends with Gavin all my life but I can honestly say this is the first free meal he’s ever offered me; the cheapskate.
- I’ll be there for you at the next wedding when this one doesn’t work out
- To the bride and groom–60% of marriages end in divorce and in the rest, you live happily until death. Here’s hoping you die.